Wise Or Otherwise

According to Deccan Chronicle (The self proclaimed largest selling news paper of Hyderabad), there has been a 20% increase in the number of foreign visitors to our city, compared to the previous year. This, if you ask me, is good news. It's another matter that if Deccan Chronicle says it's 20%, the actual figure would be somewhere around 2%.

Well, this post has nothing to do with the authenticity of those figures. I don't care if it's a 2% increase or 20%. What I do care for, is for them foreigners to have a pleasant stay in the city. So, after many hours of hard work, I, for the benefit of the foreign traveler, came up with a comprehensive guide, which, hopefully will clear all their doubts and make their stay a memorable one.

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 6:36 PM | Permalink | Comments

Hibernating!

Will be back in a bit!

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 10:41 PM | Permalink | Comments

What is it about love that brings forth such extreme emotions in a person?

A person in love says:

"I love her so much that I can die for her."

"She's the reason I'm alive."

"She's the most amazing person ever. There cannot be a girl like her anywhere."

The same person after a Break-up:

"What the fuck does she think of herself, H-uh?"

"I'll never forgive her for what she did."

"I'm not gonna let her lead a peaceful life again after what she's done to me."

And even after using such abrasive language aginst a person whome he supposedly loves, wants to get back with her. A spurned lover thinks that he's always right. That, if at all, the girl must be blamed for all that has happened. That, he wasn't the reason for the break-up. That, he has the right to say and do anything he wants against a person with whome he just broke up.

What he doesn't and will never try to understand, is the pain which the girl is going through at that very moment. That, there was a reason behind her decision. That she tried her very best to make things work out between them. That she sacrificed a lot in the name of love. And that she even had to lie to her parents on many occasions.

The first reaction of a spurned lover is to persuade her to get back to him. He tries everything he could-Which, if you ask me, is not a wrong thing to do. But for some guys, it doesn't stop at that. If the girl is adamant at not getting back with him, he resorts to cheap tricks. He threatens her, physically abuses her, et al. What he doesn't care a damn for, is the reason behind the girl's decision. He just doesn't wanna know. And by doing things like that, he's not only growing apart from her, but also ruining his own life and career.

It hurts to break-up with someone you truely love. It's diffcult to let go of all those wonderful memories. Memories, which you've shared together for so many years. It hurts when you see a couple holding hands and whispering sweet-nothings, 'cos you instinctively place yourself in their place. It hurts when you goto a restaurant, which, before your break-up, was your favourite haunt. It hurts to be alone 'cos you feel like thinking of her. It hurts to be in a group, 'cos then, you cannot think of her. It hurts when you call her, after a long day at work and she nonchalantly cuts the phone. But your being hurt shouldn't be reason enough for you to make life hell for her 'cos, for all you know, she would be feeling the same way.

Leave her alone. Let her live her way. Let her choose what's best for her. If, after a few months, she feels that she made a mistake by breaking-up with you, she'll come back. Until then, you don't loose hope. Never loose hope. You face life as it is. Face it and live with it! That's what life is all about and that's what will make you a better person.

Here's to everyone who were ruined in both mind and spirit, but never gave up the will to live and carry on. To Athiya. To Mushtaq. To Harsha. To a girl who doesn't want to be named, but who is reading this and knows that I'm speaking of her.

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 11:54 AM | Permalink | Comments

Have you ever started a day that just felt like the twilight zone and as each minute advanced, the feeling got worse and worse? That's exactly what I experienced today. It was a creepy feeling, trust me, really creepy.

And talking of creepy feelings, how can I forget this creepy incident that happened to me when I was in my 7th class (grade).

It was a warm Sunday morning, perfect for a 12 year old, inquisitive guy like me to explore new horizons. So, after giving my morning Roll Call (OMG! Roll Call? As in, a Hostel?) Yes, Roll Call.. as in a Hostel. I was in a Residential School until my 8th grade, remember? Okay, so, after giving my Roll Call, I furtively go to my room, get dressed and set out on a journey which would change my life forever.

So, I walk down our play ground-making sure no one sees me-towards a small opening, which would get me outta the campus. Once out, I take a bus to the only theatre in town which showed Soft-Porn movies (Golly gee, didja just say Porn? As in, Pornography?) Oh yeah, you bet your Asteroids, I did. In a way, I was a Child Prodigy when it came to such stuff. But then, how does it matter now? Okay, once near the theatre, I stand there and observe people-hoping to spot someone of my age. And after waiting for a few futile minutes, decide to go and get my ticket to adulthood.

"One ticket, sir." I gingerly ask the Box-Office dude.

That guy must have got the shock of his life 'cos he just kept staring at me. And after a few seconds, says, "Idi pillala movie kadu (This is not a kids movie)."

Well, Du-h!!!

But I didn't give up. "Sir, please, naaku ee movie chaala choodaalani undhi (Sir, Please, I desperately wanna watch this movie)."

After prodding along for a few minutes, the guy finally agrees and gives a "I bet this won't be your last soft-porn movie" look. But ofcourse. I mean, it's like giving someone a Lays chip and saying, "I bet you can't eat just one....tan tana".

So, I walk in, watch everything which a 12 year old guy would find interesting and come out satisfied. "Aaah," I think, "I can now brag about this to everyone..Yada Yada." I then board the bus and cogitate about the hero's welcome that I would be getting. What, with me being the first guy from my school to ever watch an adult movie and all.

Once inside the campus, I saunter towards my room and whom do I see there? The Warden! "Gosh," I think, "Not him! This cannot be true."

"So, Raj, where were we since morning?" He asks with a look on his face, which, well, only a Warden can have.

"Father...err...father...I was in the playground...."

*SLAP* Right across my face.

"Playground, eh? You little twat, you..you..nit-wit.."

*SLAP* another one. This time on the other cheek.

*SMACK* Okay, that was the cane coming in contact with my 12 year old BUTT.

I couldn't take that. I start weeping, begging him to stop hitting me.

"You are a shame to our hallowed institution." He yells and walks outta the room.

Boy! Was he pissed-off or what? I later learn that someone from the school saw me near the "seedy" theatre and informed the warden. Damn! And what was that "someone" doing near the "seedy" theatre? For all I know, that "someone" could have been the Warden himself. Asshole.

That night, unable to sleep, I went out of my room, to the balcony. It was a Full Moon night. And, I couldn't resist the urge to make the moment count. So, I threw my head back and howled

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 1:34 PM | Permalink | Comments

I don't get it! And neither would you or for that matter anyone reading this!

What's with girls (A few of them, at least) these days? The other day I was speaking to this old friend of mine, whom I stumbled upon while in a book store. She comes up to me and giggles. She just stands there in front of me and giggles. I, for obvious reasons got really curious. I mean, who wouldn't, if out of the blue, a pretty chick stops in front of you and starts giggling like a clown? So, I mustered up all the courage I had and went up to her.

"Why're you giggling at me like that?" I asked.

"Well, didn't you recognize me? We were bus-mates while in school." She says and giggles again.

"Oh! Yeah, Sharbani? What a pleasant surprise. How're you doing? What's up with you lately?" I ask her.

She doesn't reply to that! She goes on giggling. And after giggling for what seemed like eternity, simply says, "Damn! I gotta go; my friends are waiting for me." And giggles her way out without even caring to answer my question.

I stood there, totally flummoxed, staring at her...err...rather curvy behind and think, "This girl has certainly come of age!"

But what really pissed me off was her sudden retreat. I mean, she could have at least answered my question and left! That was the least she could have done after all the giggling. But no, she doesn't. She probably wanted it to remain a mystery until we stumble upon each other again after, say, 10 years. Great!

And there's this other friend of mine with whom I used to chat until she successfully managed to piss me off with her weird language, which according to her was "Modern English".

Show her anything remotely cute and she goes, "Awww....Choooooo Chweeeetttt...He's such a coochie coochie pie..." Tell her anything funny and she goes, "lolzzzzzzzzzz" Tell her about an incident where in the guy was a little late 'cos he was stuck up in traffic, resulting in him getting late for a date with his girl and she goes, "Arrgg....That's soooooo meaannnnn, he's such a loserrrrrrrrr."

This actually reminds me of an incident in college, where this one time, this really hot chick and I were having a conversation in the canteen and out-of-the-blue, I hear this "Brrrrrrr" sound, which unmistakably was one of those I-Had-More-Food-Then-I-Should-Have farts and the next instance, she goes "Gosh! This floor is sooo slippery and my shoes, they make all weird noises...Blah Blah...." Well, I felt bad for her, I really did! I also tried my best to control but couldn't; and I burst out laughing right there, on her face! She was shocked, but then, was sportive enough to join me in my laughter. It was really funny the way she warned me saying, "Raj, I'm gonna kill you if you even think of telling this to anyone!"

Well, I just hope she doesn't read this!

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 2:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

My friends-Abhijit and Teju-are making a few changes to my BLOG template! It'll take a few hours/days for them to finish!

Inconvenience caused is regretted!


UPDATE: Work on the Template's done!! Please do leave your comments on the look and feel of the new one!

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 10:36 PM | Permalink | Comments

As Louis Khan once said, “Even a Brick wants to be something!”

A Brick wants to be something!

It aspires.

Even a common, ordinary Brick wants to be something more than it is.

Wants to be something better than it is.

And that is what we must be!

I so love Indecent Proposal!

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 1:22 PM | Permalink | Comments

I’m a Teetotaler! Yes, I don’t booze! The fact is that, in my 21 years of existence, I’ve never touched alcohol nor did I feel like touching it…..EVER....until yesterday, that is!

Yesterday was weird in more ways than one:

I woke up at 6 AM and brushed my teeth for ONLY 7 minutes (I normally brush like a man possessed for ~12 mins!!)-Weird!

I took bath soon after that-Weird!

Had my breakfast by 8 AM-Weird!

Got to work and replied to all of my mails-Weird!

Didn’t crib when there was this customary power cut-Weird!

Went down to our living room and spoke to my folks and sister for more than 45 minutes-Weird

Weird! Weird! Weird!

So, on this very weird day, I got this eldritch thought, of tasting Vodka! If not Vodka, at least a glass of wine or Beer, or, well, at least a Breezer! The bottom point is that, I wanted to desperately taste alcohol in any form.

So, I call up this friend of mine, who, like me, has never boozed. I go and tell him my weird happenings and try my best to convince him.

Me: “Just this ONE time, dude! Let’s do it ONLY once. I’ll pay for your drink too!”

Friend: “What? You must be kidding! You know me very well, dude! Alcohol and I simply don’t go together.”

Me: “Awww, c’mon, dude! I’ll take you to the best Pub in the city-Bottles and Chimney! Think about it! Loadsa chicks and all. You can letch all you like. No one to stop you! Who knows, you might finally find the chick of your dreams!”

Friend: “Chick of my dreams?? In a Pub? You kidding? *thinks for like 2 minutes* “Hang on a minute…didya say I can letch as much as I want?”

Me: “Positively, dude! Take my word for it! No one to stop you.”

Friend: “Okay, what time?”

Me: “I’ll pick you up at 8 PM?”

Friend: “Done! And hey, you were not kidding about the “letching” part, right?

Me: “Well, you’ll see for yourself!”

What I didn’t reveal to him was that I’ve never been to a pub before! I took a chance and he fell for it! Great!

By 8 PM, I was at his place! For once in my life, I was on time (weird!). My friend, dressed primly, was waiting for me. It was evident from the look on his face that he was tensed about this whole affair.

“Let’s get the hell outta here, dude.” He says.

We reach BnC by 8:25 PM. After parking our vehicle, we gingerly walk towards the entrance door. And for the first time in my life, (Other than in Hollywood movies, of course) I get to see a Bouncer! Boy! Was I surprised or what? Here was this huge man, with biceps the size of my thighs, looking menacingly at us, like we were some suicide bombers, about to blow up the damned place!

Once inside, my friend was on cloud # 9!

“Look at the chicks, dude!!” He exclaims, “So many chicks, hot one’s at that and all at one place!!”

He was right! There were quite a few of them. Whoever said Hyderabadi girls are not “out-going” hafta come to this place!

We chose a table bang in the middle. “We can get a clear view of the surroundings, dude!” reasoned my friend.

The problems started once we got the menu in our hand!! My friend, who was until then, letching, suddenly had to make a choice!

“Dude, do we get Naans and Paneer Buttar Masala, here?” He asks!!

I was mega pissed with him! “You outta your mind? You come to a fucking PUB and order for Naans? I’ll fucking kill you if you try to act natty with me!”

After staring at the Menu for about 3 minutess, “I’ll take a Vodka Maritini” He says.

“Hell! You know what Vodka Martini is?” I ask him.

“Nope! What is it?” He retorts.

“It’s…err…well; the name is menacing, dude!! You might get high if you drink that!” I say.

“I wanna get high!” He retorts with a straight face.

Since I couldn’t choose anything for myself, I ordered the same drink. It’s another matter that we almost puked after tasting the damned thing!! Maybe ‘cos it was our first time or may be it was really that bad, we would never know.

We came out of the place after couple of hours, where most of the time was spent ogling at pretty ladies. We did have some snacks, though. Which, for a change, were yummy!

It was a good experience, both for me and my pal! Though, all we did was take one sip of the damned cocktail!

“When are we coming here again, dude?” He asks me when I drop him back at home!

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 1:20 AM | Permalink | Comments

Pankaj Udhas' name needs no introduction. In a career spanning over 20 years, his lilting and melodious music brought ghazals back into popularity. With his beautiful voice and soulful lyrics the evening promises to be a feast for the ears.

Proceeds from the sale of donor passes will go towards child development projects supported by CRY.

It is an opportunity for you to make a difference to the lives of underprivileged children!

Date: Friday, July 15, 2005

Venue: Viceroy Hotel & Convention Centre, Hyderabad

Time: 7:00 pm

Donor passes:Rs. 1250 per person (inclusive of dinner)
Rs. 750, Rs. 500, Rs. 300 (excluding dinner)

Please contact Mr. Nirmalya Chakrabarty at 9391170399 or e-mail at cry.hyd@serwizsol.com for Donor Passes or for more information.

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 7:06 PM | Permalink | Comments

That was one of the most memorable moments in the histroy of sport! Lance Armstrong winning his sixth consecutive Tour De France title.

Tour De France 2005 starts today!! And the great man will be gunning for his seventh title! Not a mean achievement, considering the fact that he was a Cancer survivor.

Lance was diagnosed with testicular cancer, which, by then, already spread to his brain and lungs. But with surgery and chemotherapy, he is now cancer free.

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 12:16 AM | Permalink | Comments

A "doc" a day, keeps the Apple away!

It's OVER...Finally!

It's another matter that I crossed the deadline by over a month, but then, who cares? It's OVER now! And I can now live a peaceful life!!

Life without "Docs", as someone once said, is like being marooned on a Caribbean Island with '500' of the most beautiful women, wearing nothing but a polka-dotted string bikini. Now, that, my friends, is Utopia. And, that is where I am now!

Life of an Entrepreneur-especially if you are in into a 'What-the-heck-is-your-venture-all-about?' business-can be tough.....Very tough! You have to let go of all the good things in life and work your butt off until your business stabilizes. And in order to survive, you also need to do some itsy-bitsy kinda work-better known as 'Part Time Work'. Now, "Docs" come under the itsy-bitsy category. The following is an excerpt taken from the book, "Docs for Dummies", written by Sasikanth Chemalamudi B.E (Hons), BITS-Pilani. It explains the rationale behind the term "Docs" among other important things.

~~~

Docs for Dummies: If you are young, energetic, reasonably good at English and more importantly, Broke to the core, then you are the right person to do the "docs"! You will be given a Keyword and based on that Keyword; you have to type in a 500 word document. And you have to make sure that the 'keyword' is repeated at least 12 times in the document. It's simple, it's easy and you earn 50 Rs per doc.

For example, take the keyword as “San Diego Zoo". So, using this keyword, you need to type in a 500 word document. Sounds fun, doesn't it?

~~~

That then, folks, was an excerpt from the New York Times Best selling book, "Docs for Dummies". And that was exactly what I did for over a month now.

I was given seven days to do 31 docs (It's another matter that I took over a month to finish them).That's like 15,500 words of sheer gibberish in just a week!

The following is an example of one of the "docs" done by Harsha, who happens to be a qualified CA, my business partner and who, like me, is broke:

(Statutory Notice: Reading of Docs can cause serious mental health hazards. Do it at your own risk.)

Keyword: San Diego Zoo

“If you are planning a trip to South California, it would be obvious that you would be halting at San Diego; weather over there would never be a hindrance. If you have completed the plan of places to visit, you need to verify if you have included San Diego Zoo in the list. If you have not included it in the list, you need to add one more place to the list, the San Diego Zoo. If you have not yet prepared the list of the places to go, it is time for you to start one wherein the amazing San Diego Zoo needs to be there.

The city of San Diego has a zoo which is amongst the largest and progressive in the entire world. The San Diego Zoo happens to be owned, preserved and maintained by the Zoological Society. If you want to know more about the zoo and want to schedule a trip to the zoo, San Diego news papers could be of considerable help providing you the necessary information.

The San Diego Zoo presents attractive animal displays like the polar bear, tiger, gorilla and panda displays in a similar breathless manner that close by amusement parks advertise roller coasters. San Diego Zoo makes use of the proceeds from its draw towards preserving the animals and also for support of zoological learning, science and maintenance. To illustrate, it does maintain the CRES which is factually the very last option for most of the species.

The breezy, sunlit sea climate is of a kind that is the best to a lot of species of animals and plants. Above and beyond a wide-ranging collection of reptiles, mammals and birds, the San Diego Zoo also takes care of the lands with an extraordinary collection of plants. As a part of the gardening efforts, it nurtures a few rare varieties of animal foods.

The San Diego Zoo is spread across an area of 47 acres in the Balboa Park. A good number of displays are to be found in cool, dappled valleys, with huge aviaries and animal displays on the edges. The San Diego Zoo exchanges few larger animals for short times with the San Diego Animal Park which happens to be a sister concern.

The San Diego Zoo is so huge that it is not possible to visit the entire place on feet comfortable in the span of a day. The escort travel around bus is soundly suggested for those visitors who come in to the San Diego Zoo with inadequate time to spare for the zoo. The tour bus is not at least for the reason that the drivers happen to be recognizable amongst the animals in the Zoo but for the reason that you might not have much time to spare.

The San Diego Zoo happens to be private, and not like most of the public zoos it would not put up with even unintentional ill-treatment of the animals. Guests are directed to not give food to animals and any such occurrence would result in being ejected.”

So, as you can see, “Docs” can be fun to read, but then, imagine typing in 15,500 words of that crap!!

Thank god, I’m still sane.

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 1:08 PM | Permalink | Comments

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 11:51 PM | Permalink | Comments

As Otto von Bismarck once said, " A statesman... must wait until he hears the steps of God sounding through events, then leap up and grasp the hem of His garment."

I know i've kept you people waiting for some time now! But then, i'm sure you'll understand my predicament and that i'm gonna get back to blogging with a bang. One day, or two days at the max, is all I ask for!

Thanks for the patience, people!

Posted by wiseorotherwise at 4:27 PM | Permalink | Comments